Inside Rough Trade
A visit to Rough Trade, Silverlake’s resident leather shop, proved to be an adventure for Diego. Needless to say, his school boy naivete was compromised.
Enough said…
Uncategorized | Comment (0)Embraced in nature’s bosom
Despite an aversion to mornings, Diego was at the Hollywood Farmer’s Market by 9:30 a.m. on Sunday. Why? Because nature called…
A grape stand with cabana boys equals a happy Diego.
A family reunion first
It was a balmy night when Diego stepped from the turbo prop plane onto the tarmac at the Dodge City Airport. Ah, home. Back where both he and his highlights were born a mere seven months prior.
It is standard protocol for Martin—master puppeteer and grandfather to Diego—to fetch both of us at the airport. Grandpa Burke also has been known to provide libations for the ride home. Typically, Diego doesn’t condone drinking and driving, but the practice seems less dangerous when the driver is a trained professional and doesn’t exceed 10 mph on a country road.
Ah, but why was Diego sojourning in Kansas? Well, it was the 2010 Burke/Gleason family reunion complete with the newfound Chicago contingent in attendance. For the record, they loved Diego so much that he has an official entry on the family tree.
Diego stayed on the farm where he bonded with the free-range critters. Not in a creepy, illegal way; but in a “hey there, I’d like to see you on plate upon maturity, but waaaayyyyyy before your flesh is too tough” kind of way. (Dogs, cats and caterpillars are exempt.)
What you are seeing here, kids, is a caterpillar that will morph into a Monarch butterfly after it finds a human host upon which to feast…
The Gobbler from afar…
The Gobbler from not so far. Look closely and you can see the drool sliding down Diego’s face. He’s imagining a giant, feathery sandwich.
Anti-gravity devices make it possible to make out with Click the cat, who prefers night napping in the bird bath.
Those craft anti-gravity devices at work again. It seems Diego has an affinity for four-legged creatures. No wonder his Facebook relationship status is “It’s Complicated.”
Diego gives his Chicago cousins a lovely welcome…
Hee hee
Helping cousin Dick assemble the family tree using savvy and spit since there was no duct tape…
Aunt Janet and Uncle Gary, who seems a bit terrified of Diego. Though he accused Diego of trying to suck the breath out of him while he slept, nothing was ever proven.
Aunt Janet and a most distant cousin (but close neighbor), Pat Burke.
Diego’s handler (i.e., me) and my eight-year-old, wild-man of a nephew, Burke.
Grandpa Burke and Diego’s cousin, sweet sweet Payden S.
His is the love that dare not be named, for Diego’s man crush on cousin Lauretta was instantaneous…
Riding down a slipper slide roughly the temperature of a BBQ pit offered a nice respite from family bonding…
No trip to farm country is complete without imbibing at Evelyn’s in Hanston, KS…
Meet Evelyn Bruce, proprietor and doler outer of beer…
Dead drunk, Diego mounted Spuds McKenzie and asked for a ride home…
This photo was taken earlier in the evening when hand/painted-eye coordination was still an option…
My niece, Payden, who braved the dark and uneven ground in a sling to help capture Diego night stalking The Gobbler.
Neice, No. 2 (Gentry), also helped create Diego moments during the family reunion…
Uncategorized | Comment (0)Cruising MotoGP 2010
Due to an accidental “misplacement,” Diego has been absent for a few months (the poor little guy was stuck in the bottom of a box in the bottom of a closet). But after a pedicure and new highlights, he was as fresh as a daisy for his debut part deux at Laguna Seca where he attended the MotoGP races July 22-25.
Between the tequila shots and stalking his favorite rider, Valentino Rossi (or as Diego calls him, Vale) there was little time for sleep. But, Diego will have ample time for sleep when he meets the Grim Reaper of Cotton/Polyester blends. Let’s hope that doesn’t happen anytime soon.
Valentino Rossi—9-time World Champion. This crazy man raced seven weeks after suffering a compound fracture to his leg. He’s Diego’s boyfriend, though Vale doesn’t know it.
Vale on the corkscrew (turn 8A) at Laguna Seca
Going in for the stranglehold on an Army Ranger
Embracing the Hummer…a medical Hummer, no less.
Dragging on some smooth Nicaraguan cigars with Juan. Good flava, dawg.
Ethan/Carlos, host of Camp Margaritaville might have been force-feeding naive, impressionable Diego…
Diego had a grand time, but paid dearly the next day for the multiple tequila shots he threw down his gullet. Damn that Don Julio.
The Finger = Love
What is really margarita on Diego’s smock could easily be mistaken for love stains
Diego The Mediator
Watch out Diego, she’s a biter…
Rockin’ it out in the RV. And for the record, the Cruise America RV sucked. Nothing worked and the consensus among all of the weekend inhabitants was that it was haunted. Then again, the tequila shots may have played a part…
Hanging out in the Pit area with a fellow Rossi stalker
Uncategorized | Comment (0)Begorah and behold—St. Patty’s in Chicago!
Since January, Diego has wanted to partake of Chicago’s St. Patty’s Day celebration. And so, at 6:45 a.m. on Saturday, March 13, the festivities began…
One can’t even consider being part of a minimum 8-hour beerfest without a solid base of grease and nuclear-esque Jiffy biscuits that have the power to absorb Clorox. So yes, Diego had sausage and gravy with a side of bacon. He’s currently undergoing cardiac arrest…but at least he was scotchguarded the night prior so he doesn’t smell like beer (that much).
We were the only four willing to brave the early hour and the rain. But in the end, we had the last giggle, for our friends waited two hours in a stupid-long line…line standing makes Diego angrier.
Bonding with Bob and Brown Kevin…
Tony, the bouncer, found Diego a smashing conversationalist until Diego’s second Boilermaker—the body slams and arm locks that ensued weren’t pretty. ‘Tis a good thing that sweet Diego is flexible and malleable, much like a field mouse.
Diego was testing the waters with his sexuality and opted to make this particular day an experimental one. Enter Brown Kevin…
A Diego sandwich, compliments of Dave and Bob…Boys Town is irrevocably changed.
The man candy who were out and about that day couldn’t resist sweet Diego’s charm. Then again, neither could the ladies.
It seems Diego has an affinity for climbing when he’s lit like a Roman candle…
From Fado’s Irish Pub to the gay bars in Boys Town, Diego experienced all the fascinating sights, sounds and smells that Chicago has to offer. Diego’s offer on Oprah’s old condo was spurred by his growing love of Chicago (even though he’ll need a grow lamp during Winter.) Sure, he could have had his pick of any condos being short-sold, but he couldn’t deny his love of the mirrored ceilings and the midget butler.
Uncategorized | Comment (1)Taking acupuncture like a man
It was itchy ears and unrelenting sinus pressure that sent Diego running (kind of) to Dr. Cho, his most favorite acupuncturist. In the past, she has treated him for acne, irritable bowel syndrome and a slew of other maladies that were mostly due to a hormonal imbalance (he was budding man-breasts and had no idea why). This time around, it was a simple treatment for allergies, though admittedly, she had a difficult time finding the proper points…
Diego is in harmony with the elements now…he feels love for Mother Earth, his warm-blooded brothers and sisters, even the rattlesnakes and skunks in the region of Runyon Canyon. But he hates smog—it dulls his highlights.
Uncategorized | Comment (0)UFC 110: Diego Down Unda
A flight to Sydney, Australia, to watch UFC 110 seemed impractical. Instead, Diego opted for Dillon’s Irish Pub where the food is shat and the beer is cheap. But even though Diego was denied said trip, he was not to be denied the lilting sounds of the Australian accent; for beside his table sat the three Aussies below. Coincidence? I think not. Fate loves Diego.
The Aussie’s also loved Diego and Ed Hardy-wear….
Names are escaping Diego, but the guy bowing definitely had his arse handed to him. This brings to light a valid question: are the steroids really worth the hair loss and whatever it does to the twig and berries if a fighter is still getting pummeled? Food for thought…
For now, Diego will watch from a bar. But soon his stealth training in combination with Muay Thai boxing, Jui Jitsu and Krav Maga will take him beyond street fighting for a couple bucks and a bucket of chickent to THE CAGE. Fans will adore him. Women will flock to him. With that in mind, Diego needs a Scotch Guard treatment…
Uncategorized | Comment (0)Bargain lingerie galore
Target is one of Diego’s most favorite shopping venues, for it has hot dogs, lace panties, OFF and Nerf footballs under one roof.
Rooting and scooting through women’s underwear—XXL for pleasure.
Rocking out in the lingerie section has an element of danger when Target employees are nigh…But Diego “Danger” VonTrickster loves the excitement.
Puppet of the night
Diego has a special affinity for bartenders, primarily because they get him lit sans judgment…
discussing world politics and the woes of religious persecution with Tyler, bartender at the Scorpion
Diego’s bartending friends at The Grill declined a photo, but that didn’t stop him from wreaking havoc…
getting busted in an attempt to motorboat Marilyn Monroe
death would be sweet if only it came from drowning in a vat o' Belvedere vodka
On the set of The Office Escape
Diego on the set of the movie, The Office Escape. Technically he wasn’t cast for a role, but the Hollywood types certainly enjoy his company.
a new, anatomically correct friend
sucking up to the director of the film, Jason Wolf
Diego was later spotted delivering young Jason a muffin basket and a necklace of green jade for good luck…well, less because of the luck than the fact that it was on sale beside the dollar DVDs at 7-Eleven.
operating kind-of-heavy-machinery is sexier than surfing in the buff
Even though Diego was only on set for a few hours, he was inspired to become one with Hollywood. He has since purchased a bedazzled phone, sports car and a dog small enough to fit in a coin purse.
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